Your Children are not your Children

We can really rush this process if we want to. Force independence before our children are ready – and of course all children are different. Some are lone wolves from the moment they leave the womb, then there are those who are happiest in your arms well into late childhood.

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Sorry Not Sorry

When I was growing up, misdemeanours were immediately rectified with a parroted “Sorrrrrrry”, while we glared at each other. More serious misdemeanours involved a trip to the naughty corner, whereafter we’d meet, hands out, and recite “Make friends, make friends, never never break friends, if you do you’ll catch the flu and that will be the end of you”.

It worked. My sister is still my best friend (and I’m terrified to break that in case I actually die.)

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The Negative Loop

In my mind, the only way to break the negative loop is to kill it with kindness. To do whatever you need to do to get yourself back in problem solving (rather than a problem seeing) frame of mind. For me, that usually involves taking a moment to really look at my kids, which reminds me how small they are and that they’re not giving me a hard time, they’re having a hard time.

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